February 14th: Valentine’s Day!

IDsteve,

This isn’t exactly unique to Korea, but guys, just know that Korea should be the object of your envy when it comes to Valentine’s Day. See, here, you don’t have to do anything! That’s right—just sit back and receive your chocolate from that lovely lady of yours.

Yes, Valentine’s Day in Korea is all on the woman’s shoulders. Several days before the 14th, streets are lined with vendors selling baskets of chocolate, which is a standard gift for boyfriends or even male objects of admiration. Those girls who want to go all-out even raise the bar beyond that, as Valentine’s Day is a huge profit-winner for department stores, hotels, bakeries, jewelers, and pretty much any other types of consumer goods vendors you can think of.

In Korea, this is definitely a great day to be a man!

IDkorea0099

Valentine’s Day Special: The Concept of Chivalry in Korea

IDsteve,

In honor of Valentine’s Day coming up next week, I thought we would address the concept of chivalry and dating in Korea. Korean men, especially younger ones, deservedly or not, have a reputation around the world as romantics. Early on in relationships, they tend to shower their girlfriend with affection, in hopes of securing a long-term relationship.

A significant concept in Korean relationships is that of 100 days. After a child is born, families have a celebration on their 100th day, giving thanks to Samshin (the birth goddess), for helping the mother and child through their most delicate time.

The 100-day mark has a similar importance for couples, who often celebrate this occasion with gifts. Popularized by Korean dramas which seem to significantly impact outsiders’ views of Korean men and romance, it is an opportunity to exchange gifts, and the first time at which it would be considered appropriate for the guy to express his love for the girl. Also, it has become a popular trend for couples to celebrate this day by dressing exactly alike—that’s right, shoes, pants, shirt, etc.

However, while during this 100 day period it is likely to see the guy showering every possible bit of affection onto his new girlfriend, it isn’t likely that this treatment continues far beyond that. Korea is still a male-dominated society, and traditional gender roles are still alive and well. So once a couple is established, it is generally expected that the woman serves the man by cooking, cleaning, etc. You won’t often see an elderly Korean man open the car door for his significant other.

So ladies, next time you are walking in Korea and see a guy carrying his girlfriend’s purse (yes, it is quite a normal sight to see a grown man prancing around with a Louis Vuitton bag on his arm), you should probably consider that they are likely still in their 100-day period before your heart melts into the pavement.

Definitely signs of a first-100 day couple: dressed alike, guy carrying designer purse.

Definitely signs of a first-100 day couple: dressed alike, guy carrying designer purse.

Korea’s Warped Ideal of Beauty

IDsteve,

The ideal of beauty extends to males too....I think?

The ideal of beauty extends to males too….I think?

For better or worse, looks matter in Korea. I mean, looks really matter. Regardless of where you go, you’ll see girls on the subway, in their cars, at a crosswalk, restaurant tables and anywhere else looking into the little tiny mirrors that seem to be customary cell phone compliments. If anything is out of place, it gets fixed, then and there. If anything is too out of place, well that’s just cause to break whatever had been on the day’s agenda and head home to get it sorted.

In a country that thrives on pressure, and even breeds it as a national sport, women always need to be on their “A” game. It’s too cold for that mini skirt? Wear some tights underneath. You will be walking a lot and don’t want to wear those stilettos? Tough, do it anyway.

Alarmingly, this pressure to appear perfect doesn’t stay limited to portable mirrors and choice of attire. Cosmetic surgery is so commonplace here that there seems to be a doctor offering it on every corner, and all of them stay busy. Conservative estimates suggest that half of women in their twenties have had some surgery done, in many cases several, and most anyone here knows that number is actually much higher. There is even such an obsession with angular-shaped faces here that cosmetic surgeons can essentially shave jawlines.

A menu of cosmetic options (image credit: girlandtheworld.org)

A menu of cosmetic options (image credit: girlandtheworld.org)

Eyelid surgery is most common, because Korean women all seem to be mortified that they don’t have a natural fold in their eyelids combined with a fascination for large eyes. But for women who have put on a few extra pounds, liposuction tends to be the preferred solution as opposed to exercise, and nose jobs are highly common as well.

I’m all for people doing what they wish to do with their bodies—want to cover it in tattoos? Do whatever makes you happy. The problem I have here in Korea, however, is that in spending enough time around these people, you get the sense that in most cases, the work that is done is not even necessarily because the girl herself wants it. Instead, she feels pressure from society, perhaps even subconsciously due to the importance put on the standard of ‘perfection’ here. Indeed, this is a country where photos are still attached to job or college applications, and most people believe that looks can be not only a deciding factor, but an absolute essential to even garner consideration.

What’s worse is that these unrealistic ideals are confirmed even in the home, where it is common for parents to pay for cosmetic surgery on their teenage girls. Can you imagine actually wanting your own child, the fruit of your loins, to be put under the knife because she isn’t good enough?

At some point, this has to stop if Korea is to continue its growth as a major player in the world economy. Pressure to be beautiful isn’t on the radar of human rights watchdogs yet, but at the rate Korea is going, it could soon be. Jobs and promotions are still won and lost based on willingness to perform sexual favors in this still male-dominated society, as the suicide case of actress Jang Ja-yeon, who was sexually abused by several entertainment executives, shed light on. Along those same lines, it was news recently when a local politician was quoted as telling a group of students that debate judges, of which he was one, “don’t really pay attention to the debate. They are actually interested in how participants’ faces look.”

Quite simply, the combination having males still highly dominant in this society, and the lack of any cultural theme that beauty comes in different shapes and sizes and colors, or is in the beauty of the beholder, makes for a potentially major social issue in Korea.

Don’t tell me what is or isn’t beautiful unless you want a smack in the jaw.

Jang Ja-yeon's story exemplifies what is wrong with Korea's pressure society (image credit: popseoul.wordpress.com)

Jang Ja-yeon’s story exemplifies what is wrong with Korea’s pressure society (image credit: popseoul.wordpress.com)

January 14th: It’s Diary Day!

IDsteve,

Today is the 14th, and you know what that means! There is something special going on in Korea!

As one of the world’s most advanced and bustling consumer goods economies, Korea has, more than anywhere else on earth, mastered the art of creating demand. And one of its most effective tactics has been to create artificial holidays designed to move products off shelves.

Today happens to be Diary Day. On this special day, couples exchange for the upcoming year with each other. Clever and convenient, right? This way, they can mark each other’s birthdays, anniversaries, and other special plans they may have together in the upcoming year.

Happy diary-ing!